I remember

I was reading through my news feed and found it ironic that the Daily Post Daily Challenge was to include a song and memories. Although this post is not exact to what the challenge was I wrote it before seeing it so I felt it appropriate to mention it……

The year of 2014 was suppose to be a year to remember. On January 1, 2014 as the ball hit the ground my fiance dropped to his knees to ask for my hand in marriage. It was not long my friends and family was all excited and my facebook page was lighting up with congratulations on our engagement.

I started looking for dresses, flowers, cake recipes, and anything you can think of I might need for the perfect wedding. On January 5th I called and asked my daddy to walk me down the isle. I was in my glory, I was getting married for the second time and this time I knew it was forever. My planning went on.

It was Sunday, January 12th 9am in the morning when my mother called. I knew almost instantly something was wrong she was fishing for something positive to say to me. “I hear a congratulations is in order. Oh I already congratulated you didn’t I.” she said. The conversation continued on as I stayed silent and listened to every word. It was Lymphoma that ended my wedding plans. It is still Lymphoma that is keeping me with no certain plan as to what will happen on May 24, 2014.  Although I know my wedding will go on I don’t know how, where, or who will be there simply because Lymphoma turned my life upside down.

My daddy will win this battle, but the truth is, it is more than likely I will need to face the fact that my parents will not always be here sometime in my life. I started to look at things I never looked at before. I started remembering everything my parents did to get me where I am and I realized, although not perfect, if not for them I would not be who I am.

Take the time to tell your parents you care while they are still here, don’t wait, you never know when everything might change.

Cecil C Stoops Jr I can not tell you how proud I am that you are my dad.

Remember that old farm house you bought for only $6000. There was no need to climb the stairs you just yelled up for someone to give you a hammer and we could drop it through the floor. I remember the many hours of your own sweat and blood you put into that house. With little help, a bad back, and every penny you had you fixed that house up for us to live in. Everyone told you it was impossible and you proved them wrong.

I remember the pigs you raised and deer you killed for food to feed five kids. I remember the huge gardens and hours of maintenance we put into it. I remember mom and you preserving jelly, corn, tomatoes, brussel sprouts, pickles and so much more.

I remember you chasing the school bus down when one of the other kids tore my clothes practically off and I remember you coming to the school when the principle threatened me. I remember when my ex-husband slapped my face and you saw him out the door. I remember you tearing our asses up when we did wrong and I remember you standing up for us when we was right and someone else said different.

I remember the disappointment when I got pregnant so young and was not set up for a child in anyway. And I remember the pride you showed the first time you held Anthony in your arms.

I know I fell short of your fatherly expectations many times as I grew up but, I did grow up to be the person you raised. I am strong, and my determination keeps me going. I am broke, and my family makes me rich. I bark like a pit-bull, but I bite like a mosquito. Just like you daddy I will give the shirt off my back to someone that does not have it.

There will always be those who will say you did it all wrong. Daddy I say you did all right. If you would have done it any other way I would not be who I am and I love who I am.

Ten years from now I want to say I remember the pride you felt when you held your great grand child in your arms. So I will be there every step of the way no matter what together we will all KICK CANCERS ASS.

This song is for you daddy. Oh yeah and you and I will dance at my wedding to this song.

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13 Responses to I remember

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  4. It’s really hard for me. Recently my Dad and I didn’t talk, after a bad fight, for weeks. I broke the silence. Finally the other day. We live in the same house.

    • estoops says:

      My relationship with my parents has been rocky because of that I think there is a certain amount of guilt that comes along with my feelings. My parents have not always been perfect people god knows I could have held a grudge, it just is not inside me. I love my daddy and I pray everyday for a quick healing for him.

  5. ladymarielle says:

    You are lucky to even have a dad. I think one of the reason I don’t necessarily WANT to get married is that I would not have anyone to walk me down the aisle. I hope everything turns out ok

    • estoops says:

      I know you are right. My entire adult life I have always said we walked some rough roads together, but I could not imagine not having my mommy and daddy. I knew many kids as I grew up that was lacking a parent and sadly that is only getting worse today. I always felt bad for them. I wish you well, and thank you.

  6. Great post! Thanks so much for sharing 🙂

  7. An absolutely beautiful song. I hope your Dad responds well to the treatment and that walk down the aisle and dance are in the near future.

  8. Pingback: Poem / Poetry – “Abstract Alliterative Acrostalyptica” | toofulltowrite (I've started so I'll finish)

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